How to Get What You Want
Flashback: You're 16. You just got your license. You want a BMW.
The Convo With Papa:- You: Papa, I need a freakin' sweet ride!
- Dad: No! Take your brother's Pinto.
- You: But I want a BMW.
- Dad: It's too expensive. Go away.
- You: Ahh!
- a) Papa, I'll run away if I don't get that BMW.
- b) Papa, I need the ride now, you cheap-butt mutha %#@*$&!
- c) Papa, I need the BMW because the German auto provides smooth handling, arrow-like electronic stability, responsive engines, and iDrive controls to ensure I'll be in one piece -- safe and sound when I arrive home after volunteering with the city's children hospital.
"But dude, why is C correct?"
C is correct because one simple word empowers the sentence -- that word: "Because!" By using "because", you drastically boost your odds of getting what you want. You can bother people all you want with your best words; but to really influence people, they want freakishly genuine reasons why you want what you want. (And they'll see right through you if you're lying. Rule of thumb: Always -- always! -- be genuine with your reasons. Manipulative people suck!) Why does "because" work?It's in the Mutha Lucka Research.
Harvard Psychologist Ellen Langer, who is not nerdy, conducted a study on how giving reasons for requests influenced people:What
[Harvard's] librarian shut down all but one of the photocopy machines in a busy wing of the library. This quickly resulted in a long line behind the single operating photocopy machine.Experiment: Request + Reason
Over the course of several days, Langer had confederates approach a person at the front of the line with a request to "cut" in line. The confederate's request was carefully worded in three different ways. In the first condition, the confederate said, "Excuse me, may I use the Xerox machine, because I'm late to class?" The form of this question, request + reason, resulted in a 94% compliance rate.Experiment: Request - Reason
In the second condition, a confederate asked, "Excuse me, may I use the Xerox machine?" The structure of this question, a request followed by no supporting reason, resulted in a much lower compliance rate of only 60%.
"Cool! I'll need some examples for my business!"
We hear ya. Some examples to get you on the right path:- "I want to meet with you because I feel I can boost your sales."
- "I want to interview you because I admire your passion for your business."
- "I want to negotiate the price further because my business's sales have hit a quarterly slump."
- "I want you to finish the work by tomorrow because I'll need to see the Boss."
- "I want to date you because I feel we have a lot of things in common."
- "I want you to pay for dinner/movies because I have no money."
- "I want you to drive because I can't afford gas."
Give a freakishly genuine reason why you want what you want by using the magically sexy word: Because.
Have a great weekend, y'all! p.s. A's rule!
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5 Comments
on How to Get What You Want
How to Make the Best Business Decisions
2006-10-17 03:44:52 UTC
[...] In a study conducted at a Harvard Library, simply using the word “because” dramatically helped a person get what he wanted (94% vs. 60%). [...]
14 ways to maintain & boost your creative inspiration « Torley Lives
2008-02-23 13:32:59 UTC
[...] The word "because" is potent! Also, the emphasis on "time" communicates the urgency of your leave. Only an asinine boor would still keep you from leaving at this point, and if so, you have every reason to exit hastefully without guilt. [...]
desmond the great
2009-03-21 16:03:39 UTC
BECAUSE!!! hmmmm..i never noticed what a powerful word this is..LOL
howie45
2009-03-22 05:04:28 UTC
Great article..
saying because sometimes sounds like youre telling the truth even though you make little white lies sometimes...
lol
vibrantguy
2009-03-22 13:34:14 UTC
so is because more like please?..
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