How to Make Excuses

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Say you commit a mistake.

Should you:

  • a) make an excuse?
  • b) blame yourself?

Sure, you might think:

  • "If I make an excuse, I'll look better!"
  • "If I admit a mistake, I'll look bad!"

But if play the blame game, your customer will secretly think:

  • "This guy's a %^@ moron."
  • "He's representing himself really badly right now."
  • "He keeps whining."

So what do you do when you commit a mistake?

  • Blame yourself. Blame no one else.
  • Take sole responsibility; it's your complete fault, and be sincere about it.
  • The harder you come down on yourself, the more the person will sympathize with you.

Let's repeat that last statement because it's $^@% important;

  • The harder you come down on yourself, the more the person will sympathize with you.
  • The harder you come down on yourself, the more the person will sympathize with you.
  • The harder you come down on yourself, the more the person will sympathize with you.

Why? We humans look out for each other.

  • When someone's in pain, we help out.
  • When our neighbor needs to borrow a few tools, we gladly lend 'em.
  • When we need directions, folks will show us the way.

Essentially, we want to pick up someone who's down; when you admit your faults, others will reach out to pick you back up.

The more you admit your clumsiness, the more the person will open up more to you.

Try the experiment.

  1. Pick a mistake.
  2. Confront the person.
  3. Start coming down hard on yourself for your clumsiness. (Be sincere.)
  4. Then, tell 'em what you're doing to resolve the situation so that it never happens again.

See how much the person will sympathize with you, and open up more to you.

Think this is theory? KABAM. A study University of Michgan Researcher Fiona Lee shed light on the phenomenon.

The next time you make a mistake:

  • No more excuses.
  • Blame yourself like a $^@%^@ in a $^@%!@.

Not only will you start patching up your relationships, but you'll strengthen them like a mofoloko as well.

Blame You.

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Posted on February 19

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